The Burrito

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He was drunk. He left the bar early and angry when he found out the girl he was hitting on had a boyfriend. He was done for the night. He crossed the street when the light was red, but there were cars that would have hit him. Then, instead of going home, he stopped in the local late-nite burrito joint.

In front of him in line was a grizzled man. He walked tentatively like a midget on stilts. He seemed the most unlikely burrito customer in the world. He ordered quietly and slowly.

"C'mon dude," said the drunkard to the grizzled man.
The grizzled man turned back to him. "What's the rush?"
"I'm hungry!"
"Well you'll get your burrito."
"Not fast enough!"

The grizzled man turned back and finished ordering his burrito. The drunk stayed right behind him, ordering as quickly as possible, trying to annoy the man in front of him as much as possible. They arrived at the register together.

"Put his on there too," said the grizzled man.
"What?" responded the drunk.
"I'm paying for your burrito. Calm down, will ya?"
"I can pay for my own damn burrito."
"It doesn't matter cuz I'm the one paying for it."

He paid in cash, and they each took their burritos.

"Care to join me while you eat?" asked the grizzled man.
Feeling like he owed the man something, the kid said, "I guess."

They sat down at a table by the window. The kid started eating his burrito. The grizzled man took a while to make himself comfortable, then he lowered his head and muttered something before he ate. The kid kept devouring, hoping to get through this awkard moment as fast as possible.

"How was your night?" sincerely asked the grizzled man.
"OK," the kid eked out between bites.
"Doesn't seem OK."
"Well, whatever."
The grizzled man, who hadn't even opened his burrito, looked hard at the drunk kid. "Don't you care?" he asked.
"What?"
"Don't you care what you're doing?"
The kid put down his burrito for a second and swallowed. "What do you care?"
"I just do."

The drunk kid took another bite out of his burrito. This time he couldn't swallow. He choked. And he panicked. The grizzled man rushed over and heimliched the burrito out of his throat and onto the window. The kid couldn't finish his burrito after that. He gave it to the grizzled man and left.